No I haven't turned...

Zombies Can't Love has not turned into a dead blog. Nor have I been bitten and turned into a zombie. The real world just has me unbelievably busy this month. It's like the zombies have just shown up and I can't find a weapon. I'm running around trying to figure out how to survive, pay bills, train, maintain my shelter, remain safe and figure out what's for dinner! WHOA!

HAHAHA! May will be a better month for me and this blog. Don't worry, to all of my faithful readers and fans, I will be back and with a vengeance! Jamie, Alex and Evie have so much ahead of them. Will Don be okay now that Doris is gone? How much longer can they stay in their house? When will the military show up...or have all the military and governments been eaten and over thrown by the undead? Have some people become cannibals or do smart zombies exist?

These questions will be answered, more questions will arise and the dead will be hungrier than ever.

Until May, there will be other new zombie articles and tidbits for you to sink your teeth into.

THANK YOU ALL FOR READING AND FOLLOWING Zombies Can't Love!

Part 23 - Can zombies think?

Image by Martin, www.bunker-fx.de

We had all fallen asleep in the living room. Dennis woke up when Evie pinched his nose. I stretched my arms and back. Sleeping on the floor probably wasn't the best idea. I looked towards the kitchen expecting to see Doris pop her head out any moment with a tray of nibbles for breakfast. The kitchen was dark and silent. Then my memory kicked in. I looked over at Don in his big comfy chair. He was looking at the kitchen doorway too. He dropped his eyes down to his tobacco tin on the side table and began to roll his morning cigarette. Normally he would wait until after breakfast to do this. Doris used to make him wait because if he didn't he would just end up smoking two cigarettes instead of one each morning. She would joke that he was trying to beat her to heaven.

I got up, gargled with a small cap full of Listerine and went to the pantry to see what I could pull together for a morning meal. A couple cans of fruit cocktail and oatmeal. I started a small fire in the fireplace to boil some water, for the oatmeal. My presentation wasn't as good as Doris had been. She had a way of making even the worst meal seem like a five star dish. I guess that's what happens once you've attained grandmother status.

Over breakfast Dennis kept avoiding telling us what happened to Melissa and Brian. We finally wrestled the story out of him.

After we had left them at the tree Brian had asked for Dennis to tie him, securely, to the same tree that Melissa was tied to. Dennis tied Brian to the tree by his ankles and wrists. Melissa remained tied to the tree sitting down with her arms outstretched behind her. He said that Melissa cursed at them. Saying they were both pathetic and she didn't care what happened to herself. As soon as Dennis was done attaching Brian to the tree her entire demeanor changed. She broke down in tears and said she was sorry. She wanted to continue living despite how much she missed her real daughter. Melissa then divulged that she had cased out our house before showing up. When she saw Evie playing outside she cracked a plan to get into our home and kidnap her. Evie had been the only child, still alive and breathing, she had seen since the zombies first appeared. When she saw her all she could think about was how she could "have" her.

Brian and Dennis listened to Melissa's story. Brian told her that he didn't care what she said because he was going to eat her. Brian then told Dennis to take a brief walk and come back when the screams had stopped, to kill both of them. Dennis said he walked just far away enough to not be seen but watched just in case either one of them escaped their restraints. Brian took the same knife Melissa had used on his brother and jammed it into his own abdomen. It was like watching him perform Seppuku. Seppuku is a form of Japanese ritual suicide. It was originally reserved only for Samurai as part of their honor code. Samurai used it voluntarily so that they could die with honor instead of falling into the hands of their enemies.

The short blade was sharp and sliced easily through Brian's lower body from left to right. Melissa watched in shock and awe as he fell on the ground in front of her. Dennis described how Melissa cried and I felt the sweet taste of revenge. The fact that Melissa was eaten alive while attached to a tree wasn't revenge for me. The fact that she had to face her death and her mistakes is what made me satisfied.

When Brian came back as a member of the undead he sank his teeth into Melissa's leg. She struggled and kicked him. But since he was tied to the tree and her she couldn't kick him away. Brian relentlessly attacked her, that was when we heard the screams. He bit, tore, chewed, clawed, mauled and eventually tore open Melissa's throat. He ate her body until it completely stopped twitching. He ate through her nose until he was able to get into her brain cavity. When Dennis finally approached to kill Brian Mel was completely unrecognizable. Her right arm was no longer attached to her body because Brian had eaten through her shoulder. Pieces of her hair and scalp stuck to the front of Brian's shirt. The smell of warm blood was so thick in the air you could taste it.

Dennis said that Brian looked up at him right before he re-killed him and he thought, just for a moment, that he saw a flash of recognition. Almost as though Brian was saying "yes, it's time."

Alex and I both had had our thoughts of revenge come true in a way. Mel was killed on the spot and was eaten by a zombie. We started to discuss if zombies might be able to retain some memory of their lives before if it was about a subject they cared enough about. After all, the brain was the key to keeping zombies moving and also how you re-killed them. Maybe there was something in the undead's minds other than orders to hunt out and eat fresh meat. But we would probably never know the truth behind that theory. It wasn't like we were going to start using flash cards and ink blots to test zombies.

Part 22 - The three kings

Image by Martin, www.bunker-fx.de

Part 22 - The three kings

The man's name was Brian and his brother had been James. When Melissa had shown up on their scene they had been surviving quite well. They hadn't seen many zombies and they had managed to gather enough provisions to last them a while. Plus they had found a fresh water stream. They thought they just might be able to live and see the day when shit got back to normal. Then Mel showed up with that cute little girl.

One of their rules had been to not trust anyone but the rule didn't apply to mothers with small children. They helped her out immediately. She had seemed nice and James even mentioned to his brother that he thought she was stunning. He always did have a thing for brunettes.

She told them that she used to have another daughter. Her other daughter had perished in a fire when the church, she was suppose to be safe in, caught fire. There was nothing Mel could have done. The doors were barricaded from the inside. She could only stand and watch as the small church went up in smoke. There wasn't a single scream from inside though. The infected don't scream when they burn. After the Melissa took her younger daughter and fled into the woods.

I listened to the story. It was very similar to the story Mel had told us when we first met her. As Brian walked away from us I tried to piece the two stories together. Maybe I could figure out the true story. Try as I might, I couldn't make heads or tails of Melissa's lies. How could anyone be so ruthless in a world where the few surviving humans needed to stick together. None of the tortures I could imagine seemed worthy enough to punish Melissa for her heinous acts against the living.

Brian whistled twice and then once. He had spotted something further ahead of us. The pattern of his whistling indicated that he had spotted Melissa and my little Evie. I walked straight towards Brian, almost running. While Dennis and Alex fanned out on either side. She would be expecting to see me and even Alex but she didn't know that we also had a trained soldier with us, Dennis. We all knew her prowess with a sword and had seen her in battle. The only way we had any chance of taking her down was by surprise. Otherwise she was liable to have all of our pretty heads sliced up on the ground.

As I walked up next to Brian Evie saw me from behind Mel who was pointing her sword in our direction.

"MA-MA!" Evie started to get up from where she had been sitting behind Mel. I put my finger up to my lips, hoping she would remember the game her grandmother and I had taught her. She did. My little Evie instantly got down on all fours and crawled under a nearby bush at the base of a tree. Melissa searched the ground and a moment of panic set in. Evie was so well hidden that if I hadn't seen where she had gone I would never have know she was there. Alex ran at Melissa from her left side. She turned her head and as she did she was tackled form the opposite side by Dennis. He had her pinned on the ground and disarmed in lightening speed. I ran to the bushes where Evie was hiding and got her to come out. Her hair still had that wonderful baby shampoo smell and her smile made my heart melt. I had my baby girl back. My little Evie was in my arms and tears of joy flowed down my cheeks. Alex joined us and hugged us so hard I almost couldn't breath.

Dennis tied Melissa's hands together with some nylon rope he had brought with him. Then he tied her, sitting down, with her back to a tree. Alex and I watched as Brian took a few hard swings at her face. I had never seen a man strike a woman like that before, except in movies. If this wasn't the woman who had just kidnapped my daughter I would have stopped him, but I didn't care. She deserved worse than that. Dennis asked what we wanted to do with her. Alex suggested we kill her and I suggested we feed her to the undead. Brian had other plans. He asked Dennis if he was okay with torture. Dennis said he wanted no parts of it. Brian then asked him how he felt about capital punishment. Dennis then said that it depended on the severity of the crime.

Whatever was going to happen to Melissa I didn't want Evie to witness. I handed Evie to Alex and cautiously approached Mel. Her face was bloody and swollen from being punched. She looked up at me and I spit in her face.

"You fucking crazy bitch! I hope you go someplace even worse then where the undead rest." I stood back up and took one last look at her before turning to Brian. " Whatever you're planning on doing...make it ten times worse..." Alex and I walked away from the scene. We could hear Brian and Dennis chatting a bit and then a few faint moans from Melissa.

We waited back in the clearing for Dennis to come back to us. The sun was just beginning it's decent from the sky. The clouds reflected beautiful shades of purple, orange and pink. Off in the distance there came a blood curdling scream, another and then another. A small flock of birds rose up from the distant trees and time stood still for a moment. The screaming stopped. We remained crouched down in the dry, crisp tall grass until we saw Dennis jogging towards us.

"Time to move..." He helped me up. Alex got up with Evie in his arms.

We walked very fast back into the woods towards home. I forgot the rule of no speaking and tried to get Dennis to tell me what had happened. He just put his hand up and waved me off while saying "later" and "don't worry you got your revenge". I couldn't believe the speed at which we were traveling through these woods at night. It was as though Dennis had a yellow brick road that he was following without any trouble.The way he new his way through the woods baffled me. We saw a few shambling shadows and avoided them. Only once did we have to kill a zombie because he was directly in our way. It looked like it had shards of glass stuck in it's face. My guess was that it must have broke through a window or out of a car. Otherwise we speed walked almost all the way home. We paused briefly when we came to our practice shooting range.

This pit stop made Alex's eyes swell up with tears. This was the last place he had spent most of the final moments he would ever have with his mother. This was where Doris had taught us to use her small revolver. The same revolver Don had used to send her to see the angels. Now, Alex was the one trying to get Dennis to tell him what had become of Melissa. Again, Dennis just said "later" and "let's keep moving, we're almost back to your house."

When we stepped into the house Evie was asleep. We laid her down on the small lamb skin rug in the den and I sat down next to her. Alex sat down on the other side of her. We all stared down at Evie as she peacefully slept. An image of the nativity scene and the three kings came to mind and I smiled.

Romero has awesome glasses!

I just wanted to say that I think George A. Romero has awesome glasses. Seriously, check them out! I wear glasses and I couldn't pull those off. Maybe if I was an epic movie director I could...Rock on Romero!

- Chante

Part XXI - On the path

Image by Martin, www.bunker-fx.de 

Part 21 - On the path

 Seeing the dog in the woods made me realize just how small the world could really be. In such a small world nowhere was safe from the hordes of relentless undead. Sure, we were far from densely populated cities and suburbs but that only meant it was a matter of time before the masses found us. We needed to get even further away from civilisation. Maybe the deep woods of Northern Canada would be an ideal spot. Except for the fact that we would have no shelter built there or food. Damn it! Damn it! Damn the zombies! Damn whoever or whatever started this whole mess. If those fucking zombies hadn't shown up my daughter would be safe and I wouldn't be trekking through these woods hunting a crazy woman.

I was so deep in my angry thoughts that when Dennis swung his hand out onto my chest, stopping me in mid stride, I almost yelped. A little further up, just past some trees, we could see two people in the morning sunshine. One was lying on the ground and the other was bent over him touching his lower abdomen. As we watched we realized that the man standing up was pulling a knife out of the other man's stomach. This could only mean that this guy was still a living human. Cautiously, we stepping out from behind the trees and the man pointed the knife at us.

"STOP! Stay where you are!" the man shouted and we stopped. We must have looked like an old western stand off for the full minute we stared at each other.

Dennis broke the silence by taking three steps forward. The man didn't say anything but waved the knife from side to side, clearing saying "no". Alex and I stepped up next to Dennis. If this guy was insane he wasn't going survive if he attacked us. I looked at his arm that had a big bandage on it. He saw what I was looking at and lowered his knife.

" He was my brother...I didn't kill him...it was that bitch..."

"Melissa." the name escaped my mouth without a pause. The man's eyes widened and he shook his head in confirmation. I would have felt sorry for the man who just lost his brother if I wasn't so happy to know that we were on the right path to find my baby girl.

The man told us about his brother, Mark. Mark had wanted to be a tattoo artist but instead ended up working at the pizza hut in their hometown as a manager. When the zombies first made their appearance Mark had gone to his brother's house and dragged him out. He said they had to get out of town A.S.A.P. and head for the uninhabited state park. His brother had, almost always, been right about everything so he went with him. He thought his brother was crazy until he had to kill his first zombie. He and his brother had been surviving in the woods without much problem. There was a fresh water stream not too far and they had plenty of provisions to sustain themselves for a while. That is, until, they crossed paths with Melissa.

She charmed them and seemed really helpless with her daughter, Jennifer.

"Jennifer?" I had a very perplexed look on my face as I said this name. "Jennifer? That's not right, that little girl's name is Evie, she's my baby. Not that psycho bitch's!" Alex put his hand in my shoulder to calm me as I fought back angry tears.

" Well she said the little girl was hers and her name was Jennifer."

I asked the man what had become of Melissa and the girl, he said he wasn't sure. The last time he saw her was last night. They had all settled down to sleep and Mel had said she would take watch first. When he woke up Mel had split and taken most of their provisions with her. He was tied up next to his brother who had a knife handle sticking out of his stomach. He had barely gotten free when his brother came back as a zombie and bit into his forearm.

The man held up his arm with the large bandage. I stepped away from him.

" I know I'm going to turn into one of those monsters...can't blame you for stepping away from me. Shoot, I can't even blame you people if you just kill me right here where I stand. But I wish you wouldn't...after all, we're looking for the same person. You want to find your baby and I wanna destroy that woman for killing my brother and me in cold blood." The man turned his head and coughed up a wad of blood and mucus. He spit it onto the ground away from us.

" I realize we're essentially on the same "mission" but you've been infected. Having you with us isn't, exactly, a safe idea. It's like a bad scenario you see in so many movies and more people always end up dieing. No, I don't think you should come with us. I think you should let us decapitate you now before you change." Alex was right. We had no idea how long it was going to take for this man to change. He was a threat, pure and simple.

The man got down on his knees and begged us to not take away his chance for revenge. He suggested that instead of walking with us he would walk further ahead of us. Check for threats before we approached and if, or when, he turned we could kill him.

"That goes without saying." I said.

Alex and I said fine but Dennis said this was a dumb idea. Outvoted, he went along with it anyways. Before the man separated from us I had him tell me what story Melissa had told him about her and the little girl. I couldn't believe what he was telling me. If this was Melissa's true story... We needed to hurry and find Evie.

Part XX - Things that go bump in the night

Original Image by Martin, www.bunker-fx.de
Inverted Image by Chante

Part 20 - Things that go bump in the night

The evening air was crisp and clean. This was a good sign that nothing undead was lurking nearby. I took in a deep breath. It's a shame that so many forests have been cleared to make ugly multiple dwelling buildings to further expand the sprawling suburbs. I looked up through the trees and I could see the big dipper. The moon was half full and gave an eerie dark glow to the trees around me. Dennis and Alex were walking in front of me. Alex looked like he tried to strike up a conversation and Dennis politely told him to be quiet.

The wind picked up a little and the trees came alive with movement. The noise of the bare branches swaying in the wind almost sounded like running water. I was thankful that the trees weren't in full bloom with leaves. Otherwise, the woods would have been much darker but no less ominous. The wind died down to a breeze and I noticed movement off to my right. I pointed in that direction and we stopped.

The shape was low and I could hear it as it stepped on the dead leaves scattering the forest floor. I thought about the zombie dragging it's legs. What if this zombie didn't have legs and was walking using it's hands? It stopped and I held my breath. All of a sudden we heard a loud noise and the shape took off. I sighed in relief.

"Wild turkey. They're all over these woods." Alex said, "At least we might have a great Thanksgiving!" Alex chuckled at his own joke. I was relieved but I wasn't laughing.

Just then another gust of wind came up and with it came the obvious smell of death. My stomach turned and my eyes widened. The guys had smelled it too and now we were all on high alert. Dennis pointed in the direction the wind was coming from and we could see two figures heading in our direction. These were not turkeys. They shambled towards us and swayed every once in a while when they would get snagged on a branch. We spread out in a triangle formation watching the shapes before us and watching that nothing else was sneaking up from behind.

I smashed the first zombie in the forehead with the flat part of my shovel. The second zombie just barely missed biting my arm as Dennis grabbed it from behind and threw it into a tree. Alex swung his axe and the zombie was missing the top part of it's skull and brain before it even hit the ground. The first zombie was a young woman with short hair. She was wearing a trench coat and hiking boots. A bag of trail mix peeked out of one of her pockets as I dug deep into her brain with my shovel. Her outstretched arm fell to the ground as her zombie existence came to an end. I used the wooden handle of my shovel to open the trench coat. She was wearing jeans, a turtleneck and a warm sweater underneath. She also had a Swiss army knife, a Leatherman and a hunting knife attached to her belt. I showed what I had found to Dennis and Alex.

"I don't think she's a zombie who just wandered into these woods. I think she was in these woods trying to survive and didn't make it." I said.

Dennis hadn't been the only person who thought the woods might be their safest bet. If there were a lot more people, like this woman, out here then there were probably a lot more zombies out here too. I double checked that the woman wasn't getting back up before I removed her tools and put them on my own belt. I even took the trail mix from her pocket.

"You're not going to eat that, are you?" Alex turned his nose up at the trail mix in my hand.

"Why not? There's no blood on it. I'm sure she didn't touch it after she turned, I don't think they eat nuts and berries. Plus, I'm hungry. So why shouldn't I eat it?" I stuck a handful of cashews, dried cranberries and sunflower seeds into my mouth. I looked over at Dennis and he looked just as disgusted as Alex.

"What?"

They both just shook their heads and Dennis waved us on to continue walking. I ate the last of the trail mix and stuffed the empty bag in my back pocket. I'm not a litter bug. We came to a small clearing and Dennis said this would be a good place for us to rest. None of us could sleep so we sat back to back in the tall grasses. The dried grass was tall enough to conceal us yet short enough for us to see over. It was an ideal spot to take a quick break and recharge. Despite my will, that wanted me to keep moving no matter what the cost to find Evie, I heeded Dennis's advice to take breathers from time to time so that we could keep up the search as long as it took. Otherwise we would end up completely exhausted and be more at risk for making fatal errors.

I wondered how my little Evie was doing. Had she been fed, changed or clothed properly. Was she scared? She was new to the world but I'm sure she could sense that something wasn't right. I only hoped that Melissa wasn't some sort of deranged pedophile or serial killer of children. Maybe there was a logical explanation...wait, what am I thinking!? This woman killed my daughter's grandmother and then kidnapped my daughter. I don't care what explanation she might tell me. I was going to get my revenge... I felt a hand close over my tightened fist, it was Alex. I turned my head and our eyes met. His face reflected mine and I'm sure his thoughts mirrored mine too. Dennis opened a can of Vienna sausages and the noise startled us.

*Crunch* Crunch* Crunch*Crunch* Something was walking into the clearing. Whatever it was made the dry tall grass crunch under it's feet. We got to our feet still crouching. The grass in front of me moved and I sniffed the air. Nothing, not the faintest odor of death or decay was in the air. I almost expected a forest nymph or a leprechaun to show up. Why not? After all, if someone had told me two years ago that I would have to kill my zombie butcher one day I wouldn't believe that either. I was startled when I recognized the four legged creature before me. It was the some dog that had been in our backyard being chased in circles. The dog looked frightened and sniffed the air, in almost the same fashion I just had.

"Well, I'll be damned..."

"Isn't that the dog I rescued behind our house?"Alex sounded shocked.


The dog wasn't a very pretty pooch when it had been behind our house and it wasn't any prettier now. We knew it had to be the same dog because it was missing the tip of it's right ear. The dog approached very slowly and stopped near Dennis. The smell of the food must have been overpowering for the dog. It bowed it's head and Dennis threw it a sausage. It gobbled it up. He threw it the last sausage and that one disappeared even faster.

"Sorry girl, I'm all out of sausages." Dennis held the little can upside down to show it was empty.

The dog sniffed the air again and darted off, back into the woods. What were the odds of us ever seeing that dog again? I took it as a good sign. If we could see some random dog again I was positive that we would find Evie. This might be a bit of a stretch but I needed to do all the stretching I could to keep my hopes up. My little Evie was out in these god forsaken woods and I was going to find her. I just hoped we could find her before any of the undead did.

Class 3 Outbreak Game Online

Class 3 Outbreak is a free game online that gives the player the task of holding off an infestation of zombies. You can choose to play in the UK or USA. Then you control different police agents who run around and handle zombie outbreaks as they show up on the map. This is a strategy game. If you're looking for amazing high def. graphics you will be disappointed. But if you want to see how fast a single zombie attack can turn into a horde, this is the game for you. I had fun playing it. I tried my best and the little red dots (zombies) on my map multiplied like jack rabbits despite my best efforts. The characters move under trees, around walls and into buildings, all while running at 30+ frames per second on average PCs.

Give it a try and see how many civilian lives you can save and how many you loose to the undead.

CLASS 3 OUTBREAK GAME <----- CLICK LINK TO TRY THIS ZOMBIE FIGHTING GAME